We often believe that if we don’t say how we are feeling, people will not know. Invariably, people catch our energy and feel the same way about us. The world of the unspoken is mysterious indeed. Ironically, it is far more accurate than the spoken world.
People stop trusting you when you hurt them. If they believe you did so consciously and intentionally, then even more so. If they think you are a person who breaks their promises, doesn’t live up to commitments, manipulates them or speaks about them to others, they are skeptical about you.
Research on persuasion shows that our neurology is linked to the words we use. If we speak about the positive qualities in others, our listeners associate those same qualities with us. This information is being used in training people on how to be more influential. The trainees are asked to speak about the qualities that they want their listeners to see in them.
When people hurt you and you don’t speak up, you feel bad about yourself. You probably wonder if speaking will do any good. What if they laugh at you or say that you are too sensitive?
Marketing messages follow us wherever we go. We switch on the television and see advertisements with people who look like models (because they are). We are told how we can be better and have more. Social media paints pictures of the glamorous lifestyle of others. This subconsciously gives us the message: we aren’t enough! We aren’t good enough, smart enough, rich enough, etc.